Crash didn't mean a thing

I haven't posted anything in over a year, but this Christmas Eve, I actually have something to say. I came home for Christmas for the first time in 5 years (due to my "lovely" job in retail), and today my mom and I had an almost perfect day. We decided to visit the Oakbrook Shopping Mall in Oakbrook, IL to just "hang out". We sniffed body products, drank great tea from Teavana, and sniffed soaps and body butters at Lush. Finally, we decided to grab a bite to eat at the Cheese Cake Factory. We had an awesome server, and a great meal. After that, we got in our car, and started on our journey home.

While waiting for a light to change in front of the mall, we were rammed from the back of our car into the car in front of us. It was a surreal experience. It felt like my mom and I were on a roller coaster ride, and our bodies were moving back and forward in a jarring and uncontrollable way. My glasses flew off of my face, my moms hat flew off, and finally when the car stopped moving, we both just checked to see if each other were okay. We were both shaken up, and concerned for each other's health (my mom just had a hip replacement surgery in August). Before we could get out of our car to figure out what had happened, the woman in front of us jumped out and immediately called my mom a "F*ckin Moron"! My mom got out of the car and explained to the woman that she was not the person who had caused the accident, and that the person in the car behind us was to blame. The woman continued to scream obscenities to my mother, which made my mom furious. My mom demanded an apology from the woman who refused, and told my mother she needed to "Stop talking", and to "be quiet". Finally the woman made her way to the gentleman's car behind my moms, and as soon as she saw him immediately started calling him a "F*ckin Moron" and told him, "I know you don't have insurance". The police came to the scene, and handled everything in a very fast and professional manner.

My mom and I were blessed to walk away from a totaled car. The thing that bothered me most about the whole awful incident was the woman's behavior. She was white, my mother is black, and the man was Hispanic. As soon as she saw each of our ethnicities she treated us according to the stereotypes that are attached to our ethnic backgrounds. Not once did she ask us if we were okay given the fact that our car was the only vehicle that was totaled, and as soon as she saw that the man who had caused the accident was Hispanic she immediately assumed that he had no insurance. She had an all too familiar sense of entitlement that hindered her to really be present in what had really happened. She was not able to be a "human" first, and white woman second, and because of this made horrible decisions.

I only pray that on this Christmas Eve, that some how some way she becomes made aware of her false sense of entitlement, and discards it. We live in a world that is changing fast and where minorities in the US are the majority in the world. As Americans the only way that we can move forward in the right direction is if we check our privilege!!

Victoria's Secret New Make-up Line!!!

Yo, my fellow product junkie and I went to Victorias Secret the other day to scope out the new and improved make-up line that they launched, and it was beyond excellent!  They have enough of everything so that the person who is new to make-up and the good ole professional have something to enjoy.  Out of all of the products, two were my favorites.  The first product was a color corrector pallete similar to one that Make Up Forever makes, but half the price!  Besides the price factor, the texture of each of the correctors was nice and creamy, and easy to blend.

  Another product that had me weak in the knees were the eyeshadows!  They were super pigmented, and very similar to Shu Uemura in texture.  For those of you who don't know, not too many brands are messing with Shu Uemura when it comes to pigment and texture!  While the shadows are powder, they still have a very creamy texture, making them easy to blend.

Other products in the line included lip glosses similar to MAC lipglass, really nice lipsticks, makeup removers, foundations, concealer, and some bronzers.  Overall, the line is a must see, and I'm sure that if you check it out, you will leave with something.

Holla!

Beverly Johnson Hair Weave

So the other day, I dug in my trunk of talents, and sewed in a few tracks for a friend that is going out of town, and discovered that Beverly Johnson, one of the first black super models, has some bomb hair!!  We used wet and wavy, and when we wet that hair, it was gorgeous!  The wave pattern was really natural looking, and we were going for a soft "Diana" look.  As we scrunched it, it got more and more bushy and wavy, which is what we were going for.  For all of you lovely ladies, that like good weaves, Beverly Johnson's product is nice!!

Janelle Monae

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So, if I had to pick one person that is in their mid twenties, and who I truly admire, it would be Janelle Monae.  A couple of years ago, I had the wonderful experience of doing make-up for Howard University's Homecoming fashion show, and while the actual experience of doing make-up was not so great, having the opportunity to see Janelle perform live was awesome, and life changing.

  

I was tired, and pissed off after dealing with a bunch of ungrateful models, and was ready to go home when my friend suggested we go out and see the show.  We did, and Janelle's show was otherworldly.  This teeny person, in this cool uniform with one guitar player that looked like Ike Turner, with the bob wig and all, got on stage and started doing their thing. 

 Monae's voice was a raspy powerhouse that belted out songs with freedom and control all at the same time.  The energy that she exuded in her dancing and connection with the audience was also crazy.  The guitar player was so laid back in his demeanor, his picture should have been posted in the dictionary next to "black coolness".  Of course the young Howard crowd booed them, but they were so good, and so professional, Janelle and her guitar player rocked even harder!  From that moment on, I was a fan!

 I went home and googled everything I could about this "new girl that got booed at Howard's Homecoming fashion show".  I learned that I had already heard a few songs by her that I really liked including "Letting Go" which was on Big Boi's Purple Ribbon compilation CD.  She also sang the hook for an Outkast single from their movie "Idlewild".  Fast foward a few years, and she still, in my opinion, has not received the fame and notoriety that she deserves.  She was in this summer's issue of Paper Magazine, and her interview still sold me on why I love her as an artist.  

She is an out of the box thinker who understands that to be great as a  female entertainer you do not have to compromise one bit of who you are. She believes in wearing a uniform(which I think is the dopest thing ever) because it "represents her rejection of chaos".  Her make-up is flawless and fresh faced, and her music while other worldly, literally, is relevant to what is happening in society today.  One of my favorite songs, "Sincerly Jane", speaks to black people who are "caught up" in the everyday struggle of living in their not so great environments.  It talks about her relatives and folks in general who are caught up in the drug game, women who allow themselves to be taken advantage of, and all other people who seem to be just existing or in her terms, "walking dead".

All in all, from her image, to her music, I love this girl, I think that many female artists who want to be seen and heard for who they are, and for what they have to offer the world musically, she sets an excellent example.  She is truly a super hero after my own heart.  

To the moon Miss Cindy Mayweather!!!!!!!!

Imitation is the Best Form of Flattery? Really?

I cannot hold this anymore, and I don't think that I should. There is a certain ex-stripper turned celebrity girlfriend that has gotten a ton of attention because of her "unique" look.  In a recent interview outside of a Guess store in NY, she mentioned that she styled herself, and that what the public has always seen, are pictures of clothes that she has picked out for herself.  Now let me break down this gorgeous girl that we all know and love, Amber Rose.

I was inspired to do my blog page, in part because of Kanye West and Amber Rose.  Initially, I read an article in Complex magazine where I gained a ton of inspiration.  What I also gained was a refreshing take on who Kanye thought his ideal mate could be.  In the interview done in Complex mag, when asked who his ideal mate could be, his answer was a "super hero".  I imeadiatly started to try and define and visualize who and how a super hero for Kanye would look.  I imagined her to be a smart, intelligent, gorgeous women, who was well versed in everything!  I imagined her to be a women of integrity, a role model, a fierce fashionista, extremely creative, and someone who had all of that to offer the world to make some sort of positive change.  Then I started to think about women that I know personally that fit that description in some way shape or form.  After that...I learned about, and saw Amber Rose.  

I wasn't surprised, but majorly dissappointed.  I was dissappointed because she was not in anyway shape or form what I invisioned.  Don't get me wrong, the pieces that have been put together to create who we know as Amber Rose are good, but they certainly did not live up to the "super hero" woman that I created in my head.

The master mind behind her "look" deserves kudo's.  Amber is one of America's answers to the question of what "American Beauty" is. We should all know that the answer is an "exotic" ambiguous woman.  Amber fits that discription because while she is a white woman from Philly, her hair has been shaved and bleached so that the natural texture and color is not revealed, her skin has been darkened so that it is difficult to determine her race, and breast and butt enhancements have been added to make her look more "ethnic", "black", "full figured", "curvaceous". 

 Once she was introduced to the media, and especially as Kanye's girl, many black women embraced her.  I know that many of my friends personally took a look at her pictures, shrugged their shoulders, and said "cute black girl".  My mother even asked "Baby, who is the new black girl that Kanye is dating?"  I realized that what the master mind behind Amber Rose had done was make her into a black woman, and that maybe it was done on purpose to have her accepted by the black community.    If many black women think this, then they tend to not have a problem with her dating Kanye, also with the added curves, it makes her more appealing to black men.  I certainly don't think that black women should lash out on the idea of interracial dating, but I don't think it is okay to pass someone on as something that they are not either.  Besides that, I have some questions, that have come up in my mind while all of this "Amber Rose Mania" continues.

Questions

What kind of affect does her "look" have on black women? Black Men? Young black girls?

How does it make black women who have worn their hair bald for longer than Amber Rose has been famous feel now?

Is it fair for black women who have worn their hair short to be criticized for duplicating a look that has been worn by black women for centuries?(note many African hairstyles/cultures)

Who really is the person behind Amber Rose's style?  Were they thinking any of these things when her "look" was created?

Has Kanye thought about any of these questions?  Should he?

Does her look, and who she is dating perpetuate any negative stereotypes that exist about interracial dating?

Would other black/white/latino/asian women have a better chance of dating an entertainer if they looked less like what they were and more ambiguous?

In conclusion, when the people/culture that is constantly imitated is not acknowleged or celebrated in a positive way, but always duplicated and commodified, it is not flattery.  For those of us who rocked a short hairstyle before this storm, we just have to sit back and ride it out, because for us it is a part of who we are, and not a current trend.

Oh no!! We have the same dress on!!

I went to an event last Saturday, and the attire requirements were sneakers, and anything that looks good with them.  Because I consider myself a pretty stylish person, I decided to wear an HnM dress with my sneakers for the occasion.  I knew that because I bought the dress from HnM, the likelyhood of me running into someone with the same dress was high, I added a tank top underneath my dress, and wore a belt around the waist.  Not to my surprise, about halfway through attending the event, I saw another girl with the same dress! 

 I quickly took my tank top that I was wearing under my dress, and put it over my dress, and then I put my belt back on around my waist.  The main reason for me doing this "costume change" right on the spot, was the girl who had on the same dress, and her friends were starting to make an issue of the mishap.  Instead of feeding them with a visual, I decided to switch it up, forcing them to make something else the focus of their attention.  The thing that saddens me about the whole ordeal is that it is something so trivial.  

As black women we allow our insecurities to get the best of us all the time, and especially when we are in a group out in public.  Our first inclination is to always "talk about" the other women that are around us.  Often it is always in a negative manner.  With the dress incident, I think that the other girl, "my twin", should have considered the fact that she purchased her dress from a mass retailer, which means that "her" dress was mass produced, which means that the likelyhood of her seeing someone else with the dress on is always going to be high. 

 Further more, instead of us doing what we always do, which is to be catty and negative, we should just let things that are not important go.  Besides checking myself, and making sure that I don't do the catty negative thing when I am out in public, I am also going to learn how to sew this summer! One of a kind dresses=no drama!lol

Dashiki's, Kufi's, and Nike Boots?

Sooooooooo, I have been noticing a resurgence of a trend that hasn't popped up  since the 1960's and 70's during the Black Power Movement.  What is so shocking is that the trend has been picked up by young black men in the DC area, not the "consciencous" ones, but the nike boot, skinny jeans, "new born baby" cap wearing ones.  The current article of clothing that has resurfaced in that crowd is, THE DASHIKI!!!  What is crazy and sad, is that the guys that are rocking the dashiki's probably have no clue about where the tops come from, and the significance that they have had on black culture.  I'm gonna provide a little bit of info, and for those of us who can educate guys on the streets wearing the dashiki, lets do it!  If we know better, we have to do better.  In this case it might be talkin to a "young" about what his shirt stands for.